Friendship, described by definition as a mutual bond of affection and mutual trust between two individuals.
But the real truth about friendship? It's weird.
It's messy and tangled, quirky, a random assortment of traits twisted together to make a lingering connection. You can have friends you know everything about. Their family, their past, their future, their secrets, hopes, and dreams. Yet you can have friends where although you are present in their everyday problems you know nothing of their family, their past, or their future. Some friendships contain only jokes and laughter. Some are burdened by only the negative.
Yet each one of these relationships is still a friendship.
Friends are an odd commodity at the age I am currently. From teens to early twenties, things tend to revolve around one person. Yourself. And no matter the friends you pull into your inner circle, there never seems to be that balance of care.
I have learned a lot about give and take this year. It's the foundation of a healthy friendship, you both give and you both receive the love and care that your friendship entails. This means if you want to call someone at 2am to get their advice, you better be okay receiving that same call the next night. It means that there is an equality of initiation. Each person volunteering their time to make plans.
It's always been a struggle for me, seeing the care from someone who doesn't call or text unless I make contact first. I'm willing to do whatever it takes to keep friendships strong. Whether it be driving to Mankato every couple weeks to get some face-to-face time, or just making an effort to be more present in conversations that may seem unimportant. Just because it isn't necessarily deep, doesn't mean that it doesn't mean more. Just the fact someone takes the time to text me "hey" means a lot to me.
My dad and stepmom made some great points the other night about friendship when I was struggling with completely letting go. I had realized holding onto some relationships that weren't reaching out to me were hurting me more than helping me, but it's hard to let go of something that never ended. But they said an amazing thing. Some people are meant to be in your life forever, and some people are meant to just stop for awhile, and whether they come back or you never see them again, their friendship was important at that time.
So to everyone I'm letting go, to everyone who is moving on to bigger and better things in the world. You will always remain in my heart. A puzzle piece in my life that has made me who I am. This isn't goodbye because who knows if fate will bring us back together, but this is a thank you. You were there for me in one (or maybe several) moments where I needed someone to hold me together. Whether I just needed someone to tell me a joke, give me a hug, or even just say hi, each one of you found a moment to show me you cared. Your friendship will forever be appreciated.
"Some people come into our lives and quickly go. Some stay for awhile, leave footprints on our hearts, and we are never, ever the same." --Flavia Weedn
